There's a blessing
Would you believe me if I told you that there was a such thing as being blessed with a fucked up situation? Doesn't make much sense does it? If a situation is fucked up how in the hell could it be a blessing?
We go through things in life that make us and break us but what they don't tell you is that some of the things that you think are breaking you is the very thing that you need in order to receive your blessing...not just to teach you, but to humble you, thus making the situation seem fucked up.
Here it is, take me. I have lost some people pretty close to me...dead and alive. I have put myself through situations that made me feel cheap and ugly. I have been through things that made me feel less than, misunderstood, hurt and depressed. What I learned from all of those things is that I needed to be broken down, while I was feeling these things, I was also taking things for granted. In the process my blessing was right there but I kept missing it being foolish and not understanding my worth or my purpose. I let life get the best of me in the most negative ways.
I had to wake up one day.
I had to say to myself that I was way better than what I put myself through and what others put me through. And I also had to stop playing the victim in every scenario and take responsibility for the part that I played in it. Was everything in life my fault, HELL NO! There are really some fucked up individuals in this world. What I did was take the time to understand that this thing and that thing didn't define who I was, who I am and who I am destined to become. I also had to stop feeling sorry for myself and get to know myself better...and be okay with me. It took for me to get beat down, taken advantage of, be broken, be hurt and be depressed to finally realize that I had a purpose greater than what I could ever imagine...and that changed my life and perspective.
Had I not been in those fucked up situations, I believe I'd still be lost. I wouldn't have given myself a fighting chance to achieve my goals and I would settle for some bullshit lifestyle that wasn't going to be fulfilling enough to me. I had to wake the fuck up and realize that I a great, I'm loved, I'm worth it and I deserve to give myself a better perspective on life to I can give that energy to my kids and my husband. Once I understood that I became better. I don't know where I would be in life right now had it not been for that hard lesson.
In hindsight I was glad to be put in those horrible situations as fucked as they were. I am a better person because of them. Don't look at everything bad that happens to you as a downfall, but a wake up call. That is the Creator giving you tough love so you can understand the assignment given. Don't think that receiving a blessing is always going to be a walk in a park...sometimes that shit will be like running in wet cement through a haunted house with no safe word. Embrace it. It will force you to give a greater belief and faith in your Creator...and once you give in and let God do what God does, that wet cement will become fluffy clouds, that haunted house will become your dream house and you won't need a safe word...all you have to say is "thank you"!